Health Articles

Where’s the ‘I’ in FAMILY?

Leah Weisberg

 

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It’s in the middle….

Wanting to be our best AND be the best wife and mother can be EXHAUSTING, so read on to hear a few ideas that will help you have clarity in your day to day choices.

In the pursuit to perfecting ourselves, AND every aspect of our relationships, we end up tipping the scale in one direction or another – too much of meeting my own needs or too much of meeting others’ needs. The newest Self-Care movement telling us to take care of ourselves versus the Loving-Kindness movement telling us to do everything we can for others.

How do we accept that we have vulnerabilities, limitations and that we need to set boundaries? How do we extend ourselves to always be there for our loved ones, thinking about their physical and emotional needs, and display empathy towards them?

The first order is to start paying MINDFUL attention to our inner voice, hearing the conflicting desires that we have, and acknowledging that they are indeed conflicting desires. This requires TRUSTING our inner voice, and requires a lot of SELF-KINDNESS instead of self-criticism.

But it also requires mindfully choosing your actions after carefully considering all of your options. Balanced Self-Determined Behaviour, a concept used in Social Work, is uniquely not selfish and not selfless. It’s about striking a balance between what I need right now and what you need right now so that a more BALANCED approach can be taken.

In a fast paced world, we often move so fast that we don’t stop to THINK. We don’t stop to consider the emotional repercussions of our decisions and can inadvertently harm ourselves or others. Learning and practicing mindfulness skills helps slow us down, helps us live consciously, and can create a true balance between caring for ourselves and caring for others.

1. MINDFULLY Take a step back from the situation
2. KINDLY Paying attention to the internal conflict going on
2. COMPASSIONATELY Appreciating the competing demands
3. CONSCIOUSLY Considering what the BALANCED approach is

All skills we know we should practice, but that feel so hard. So starting this WEEK,
the Mindful Way to Resilience Series will give you the tools and time you need to PRACTICE these life saving tools.

First series starting THIS THURSDAY at our Yonge/Lawrence office!

Weekday morning and evening series to start based on demand.

You will be happy you came out 🙂

Restoring balance

Each person requires a unique approach to treatment. 

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